"Mr. Brad Delp. J’ai une ame solitaire. I am a lonely soul.”
I am a lonely soul. These words find in a strange time.
I think most people suffer from some degree of loneliness, certainly I know that I do.
In the recently published book, Confessions of a Pastor by Craig Groeschel, the third chapter is entitled: "Most of the Time I Feel Incredibly Lonely."
This chapter was actually very moving to me, because while I have many great friends (most living a state or 7 away), a great wife, a great family, a great job, and see many people I know everyday, I often feel lonely. And yet at the same time, I find myself also asking, what would make me feel unlonely, and then too, I have no answer.
Groeschel in his book speaks of three myths of seclusion that are certainly beliefs I fall into some time.
Seclusion Conclusion #1: I have to perform for people.
Seclusion Conclusion #2: To survive in life, you can't trust anyone.
Seclusion Conclusion #3: People really don't care about us.
I know that I am frequently guilty of trying to please people, I think so many times I want to please people, whether in work, friendships, or whatever, and as a result people sometimes don't see the real me. Which leads to #2... it's as though I'm scared if people "really knew me" they wouldn't like me, or even care for me (#3).
The band Relient K's most recent album contains a song written by front-man Matthew Thiessen called Faking my Own Suicide (lyrics here) where in a sad/goofy way thoughts about love are explored where "the narrator" speaks of faking his own suicide so the girl he loves will realize how much she loved him, even though she didn't realize it.
It's in this vein of morbidness that there is truth, I think far too many people are asking if anyone would care if they died.
Brad Delp surely must have known people cared for him, otherwise he wouldn't have left notes to his family and fiancée, Pamela Sullivan.
I know for me I need to work on trusting more and not trying to please people. I know so many people care for me and my wife and I am so thankful for the dear friends that I have, even if many of them live in so many different places.
If ever I feel lonely (like Brad Delp, Craig Groeschel or Matt Theissen), I am deceived, for I am certainly not alone.
Related Tags: Brad Delp, Craig Groeschel, Matthew Theissen, Boston, Suicide, Loneliness, Depression, Confessions of a Pastor, Relient K, Faking My Own Suicide, Music, Book, Death