Friday, April 06, 2007

Children on The Laps of Rabid Bunnies

I am perplexed. Why would you want to sit on the Easter Bunny's lap?

I can understand Santa Clause...there is a mythos of Santa Clause that has been widely created by books, songs, movies, and cultural stories. In fact, films offer different thoughts as to why a kid would want to sit on Big Red's lap. Talking to the big man himself you might create a case for your personal goodness and why you deserve excellent things in your stocking. You are likely to even make suggestions, etc.

But what do you say when you sit on the Easter Bunny's lap? Does the Easter bunny care if you're good or bad...do you make a plea for 70% cacao Godiva chocolate?

There's no good songs about the Easter bunny (I challenge you to name one).

There's no good books about Easter Bunny (Watership Down and the Velveteen Rabbit are definitely not stories about Easter Bunnies).

And frankly most Easter bunny costumes are ugly, frumpy and down-right scary.

I recently asked some friends how mall's could capitalize on Jewish parents in the Spring, and clearly the best Passover exploit would be to have children stand under a door frame with blood dripping on it overhead. Not as cute, but Grandparents always love pictures.

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9 comments:

b13 said...

Peter Cottontail...

Here comes Peter Cottontail
Hoppin' down the bunny trail,
Hippity hoppity,
Easter's on its way

Bringin' ev'ry girl and boy
A basketful of Easter joy
Things to make your Easter
Bright and gay

He's got jelly beans for Tommy
Colored eggs for sister Sue
There's an orchid for your mommy
And an Easter bonnet too. Oh!

Ando said...

and clearly the best Passover exploit would be to have children stand under a door frame with blood dripping on it overhead.

I laughed out loud at this.

Anonymous said...

bloody doorframes. great idea.

Southern (in)Sanity said...

That's a great question. They have an Easter Bunny at a local mall - and the line is almost as long as it is at Christmas for Santa Claus. What the heck is that?

I would love to see someone try to the doorway dripping blood thing. Wouldn't people go nuts?

F.J. Delgado said...

Funny... this post just reminded me of Mallrats - "I hear the Easter bunny was accosted this morning."

Anna said...

Ok, just looking at that pic....I am scared to death...and I am 30 (something)! :)

Unknown said...

The Easter Bunny is scary, the one in your picture looks ten times better than the one we had at our local egg hunt.

Anonymous said...

I see b13 beat me to the punch:

"Here Comes Peter Cottontail..."

but then again, you did say a GOOD song...so I think not....doesn't count...!

Actually, my favorite line was 'asking the Easter Bunny for a 70% cacao Godiva chocolate egg...' Laughing my socks off !!

Thanks for cruising through Red Dirt Poetry....stop by anytime.

red dirt girl

Paula said...

The reason you sit on the Easter Bunny's lap is because you hope some of that chocolate-y goodness will melt all over your best Easter outfit, rendering it unwearable so that you get to wear your jeans to church instead.

Duh!